I, rabiote.

jakemorph:

genghis-khanye:

graatrunk:

sosyebabe:

What you got made fun of in school for?

i went into american public school for 6th grade and i pierced someone’s scrotum with a fencing foil that was missing the little rubber safety tip on the end by accident in gym and it was middle school so i was promptly nicknamed “The Nut Slayer” and i cried until my parents let me move back to europe and live with my grandparents 

nutslayer is a powerful title

can you imagine a european person coming to your school for 1 year, stabbing you in the ball sac, then promptly fucking back off to europe immediately afterwards. can you imagine being the bloke with the stitch in their scrote because of some mysterious foreign spherepuncturer

(via polyglotplatypus)

sodomymcscurvylegs:

sleepyofficial:

hobgoblinhero:

nerdgasrnz:

zireaells:

egberts:

me playing any video game: *does not touch the block button at all throughout the game*

#no block button we lose like men

#dodge or die #there is no block

what the fuck is this dodge nonsense? You hit them harder and faster than they hit you and That Is How You Play Video Game

You cant take damage if the enemy is dead

Not blocking in video games is gay culture.

writernotwaiting:

thebibliosphere:

rosslynpaladin:

alpacamyhedgehog:

tharook:

ayellowbirds:

theliteraryarchitect:

veryrarelystable:

gehayi:

lukas-langs:

THOU is the subject (Thou art…)
THEE is the object (I look at thee)
THY is for words beginning in a consonant (Thy dog)
THINE is for words beginning in a vowel (Thine eyes)

this has been a psa

Also, because H was sometimes treated as a vowel when the grammar rules for thou/thee/thy/thine were formed,THINE can also be used for words beginning with H. For example, both “thy heart” and “thine heart” appear in Elizabethan poetry.

For consistency, however, if you’re saying “thine eyes”, make sure you also say “mine eyes” instead of “my eyes”.

Further to the PSA:

Thou/thee/thine is SINGULAR ONLY.

Verbs with “thou” end in -st or -est: thou canst, thou hast, thou dost, thou goest.  Exception: the verbs will, shall, are, and were, which add only -t: thou wilt, thou shalt, thou art, thou wert.

Only in the indicative, though – when saying how things are (“Thou hast a big nose”).  Not in the subjunctive, saying how things might be (“If thou go there…”) nor in the imperative, making instructions or requests (“Go thou there”).

The -eth or -th ending on verbs is EXACTLY EQUIVALENT TO THE -(e)s ENDING IN MODERN ENGLISH.

I go, thou goest, she goeth, we go, ye go, they go.

If you wouldn’t say “goes” in modern English, don’t say “goeth” in Shakespearean English.

“Goeth and getteth me a coffee” NO.  KILL IT WITH FIRE.

Usually with an imperative you put the pronoun immediately after the verb, at least once in the sentence (“Go thou” / “Go ye”).

YE is the subject (Ye are…).  YOU is the object.

Ye/you/your is both for PLURALS and for DEFERENCE, as vous in French.

There’s more, but that’ll do for now.

Oh wow. Reblogging for reference.

i haven’t had my coffee yet, so all i can think of when i read through this is: 

th’ain’t

th’dstn’t’ve

AND ANOTHER THING
“thee/thou/thy” is informal
“ye/you/your” is formal
Also also…all of this is NOT Old English but is actually referred to as Early Modern English. If you were speaking Old English, it would sound closer to German.

^That.

And IT’S NOT MORE FORMAL to use THEE.

if you address someone you should use Thee or Ye (sometime used as the plural, sometimes it’s still Thee, rules are iffy) to as You, it’s an insult by intentional distance. If you call someone you should call You by Thee, it can be an insult via assumed intimacy. 

(This is why some religions insist on still using Thee and Thou when talking to their Father God. Many of them modernly think it makes them sound more formal, but that’s not why the usage began, or why the more linguistically aware still do it. Not because it’s more formal, but because it’s LESS formal. You wouldn’t call your own Father “You” unless you wanted to imply disowning Him.)

Anyone you’re close to or on first name terms with can be Thee. Friends, family members, etc. 

Anyone you want to point out is NOT your friend, respectfully or otherwise, is You. Which is why the King is still Your Majesty. You are decidedly not his friend unless you know each other really well. (See “Henry V”. If you can also call Henry by Harry or Hal, you can probably call him Thee.

One more note! “Ye Olde- as you see on shop signs is not prounounced Yee. There’s a character called a Thorn  that was going out of style and being replaced by a curly thing that looks like a Y and IS NOT. It’s pronounced Th. THe olde apothecary shoppe. Not Ye Olde. That itself promptly went out of style as well but the error remains almost traditional.

and I am not addressing claims that I might be a vampire, lycanthrope, or other immortal just because I am fluent in Modern Middle English. 

@thebibliosphere

This whole post is a blessing because I read so much “ye olde” speak in historical stuff and everyone always gets their thee’s and thou’s wrong. Even big name authors with accuracy editors who ought to know better.

It’s more accurate to have your “poor folk” in your historical novel saying “thou” than it is to have the scholar or rich man with an education rooted in Latin, unless he’s down the pub with his mates, merry as a knave.

The whole thing just reminds me of people using Polonius’ speech in Hamlet (“to thine own self be true”), completely out of context, not realizing that the speech is intended to show Polonius as a foolish old hypocrite who enjoys dishing out council but rarely follows his own convoluted advice, which is often contradictory and falsely pious.

Which, I mean, Shakespeare often isn’t taught well outside of higher education, lets be honest. So why would they know unless they’ve studied it beyond the passing glance it gets that one year in high school before been relegated to the position of “too posh and old to be relevant” which is entirely not true.

Shakespeare is written in the language of the people, and is often more insightful and progressive than certain types of academics would like you to believe.

Shakespeare is the language of the people living in London, mostly, but yes, it was not supposed to sound “academic” or fancy at the time—though Shakespeare did pen some glorious parodies of academics who had no idea what they were talking about!

(Source: helaas--pindakaas, via kingloptr)

moami:

deseng:

moami:

if you find bones in the forest, sit a bit and listen. they are old and have some good stories to tell. maybe they’ll teach you a spell or two, or explain where the water on our planet came from.

if you find bones by the ocean, run. don’t look back. run, faster, faster. the sea may love you but there are nights where she knows neither mercy nor science, and the bones warn you only once.

boi if you find bones call the police i hate this website so much

this is a piece of creative writing, in case you couldn’t tell from the fact that real bones don’t usually go hey lil’ mama lemme whisper bony secrets in your ear or warn you of the incoming tides like a calcified weather frog.

(via kurokoccheerio)

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

I used to wear a chainmail shirt to elementary school. The teachers never knew what to do about it because there was no section in our dress code forbidding medieval armor.

In some ways, having absolutely no concept of self-consciousness and being utterly oblivious to social norms was a blessing… I did as I pleased and wound up with a cornucopia of funny stories from my childhood.

On the other hand, in retrospect it’s no surprise that I was bullied so much.

(via axolola)